Saturday, August 30, 2008


Advice is supposed to help people.I have got into more problems,giving advice.My intentions are always to provide the right judgment for the situation.But it so happens that it has always backfired.Most of the time we have made up our minds to do what we want.When we ask for a suggestion, we just want the last bit of motivation to take the jump into our own desired path.When I think deeply about giving advice I also feel my insignificance.
Who am I to make decisions for someone else?

Over the years I have also learnt to accept the fact that I really dont know,the right answer.I can give advice on buying a birthday gift.But I somehow feel that giving advice on "life-problems" is scary.
One of the easiest ways of imparting required advice is to start the advice with
"If I was in your situation ....I would have done this..."
This is one of the easiest ways of being responsible while giving advice.You dont tell the person you are going to solve the problem.But you show them a way, that you would have approached it.
The most important thing in giving advice is empathy.Sometimes I have tried to put myself in the persons shoes and walk around and examine what they are going through.This is very helpful when giving advice to a person who is ill.When the body is weak,logic fails.Physical pain is far more stronger than your voice or your actions.
Every person has their own pace and cannot be hurried up.Sometimes not helping someone may be the best help.

Thursday, August 28, 2008


Wisdom has its own natural curve..There are no schools which can teach you how to get wise.Growing old makes us wise.The levels may not be the same but it makes everyone little more wiser.But the basic problem comes with conditioning.There is always a internal war going between conditioning and wisdom.The conditioning says you to react to situations taking inputs from the past.But wisdom diverts you in a different way.
Knowledge is also obtained through conditioning.That is the reason a person with a higher degree does not automatically develop wisdom to deal with situations.Knowledge is centered on the application.Wisdom is universal.A wise person may implement their experience into absolutely everything.But a knowlegable person(say for example a electrical engineer) can only work in that particular field.A wise enginner can make feasible solutions without going against nature(Example:Sustainable models). A knowledgable engineer will waste half of earth resources making stupid devices which are upgraded every second.(Example:Cell Phone)

Sunday, August 10, 2008

Giving and receiving

Giving is always portrayed as something really great.Receiving on the other hand is shown as being meek.Charity is taken as a virtue and the people who we are being charitable to is shown with sympathy.Asking makes us feel small.Ancient monks were made to beg for food.Whatever was given to them was to be taken with a smile of gratitude.Asking breaks down the pride of ownership we have and also things we can control.I have always suffered from great displeasure when it comes to taking favors.I feel uneasy even to ask people for help when I need it.Life cannot be lived in isolation and we need support from others for our own well being.I have tried to cultivate the value of giving but I forgot to cultivate the value of receiving.When I ask something my mind creates a divide between me and the person I ask from.There is a sudden comparison mode my mind steps into.I feel smaller and the person who provides me help becomes a larger than life figure.
Why cant my mind accept that even that person requires help from other people?
Then if the person rejects the offer and not help me,my mind gets into condemning and steps into the zone of lower self worth.As our own worth ceases to exist in trivial emotions and beliefs,the less we will get effected by the outside.

Friday, August 08, 2008

Are we alike...

I have always tried to be politically correct.I have used rational ideas and logic to stand by my beliefs.On the one hand we have such high ideals that we propose and it would be a total different story when we have to act according to it.I have had the fortunate experience of working with people from different countries.My colleagues at work are from diverse backgrounds.They are from Pakistan,Ethiopia,China,Nepal,Mexico and America.When I talk to them and share experiences I don't feel the difference.We talk at how our cultures vary,but I guess the perspective matters.I try to learn a lot about their culture and initially there is some hesitation.The breakthrough for real good conversation and starting of good friendships occurs when the barriers of color and race are broken by human emotions.When my colleagues share their expectations,fears and joys I know they are exactly like me.Underneath our differences we are same.When we want to see similarity ..we see it everywhere..When we want to see differences...we see it everywhere...Our mind is a tool...we should try to use it in the right way.