Wednesday, August 26, 2009

The Rhythm of my footsteps

I can hear the loud music playing
I cant bear the sound of screaming people
In search of silence I have started this walk..
I will try to listen to the sound of my footsteps..
The birds are chirping so loudly
Insects are buzzing as the sun sets
Cars go by making a loud noise
I will try to listen to the sound of my footsteps...
My phone rings...
A song makes a appearance ... my mind starts humming
I will try to listen to the sound of my footsteps..
In vain I try to listen to some crazy desire
In vain I make all things swing my way
I give up not wanting to change anything
Suddenly I can "Listen to the sound of my footsteps"

Negative Emotions

The stink of stale food warns us that it may be poisonous.Eye catching colors in the nature contain poison which may harm us.Nature has lot of effective tools to warn us about impending danger.Everyone has negative emotions which are not distributed equally.A child is not born with a genetic defect of causing harm.Environment governs it to a large extent.Development of an individual occurs in mysterious ways.There are few psychologists who think that there is a hormonal imbalance makes a innocent person into psychopathic killer.
What role do negative emotions play in our evolution?
A violent scene witnessed by a child can make the kid into a violent person or turn him/her to protect the disadvantaged.

Negative emotions serve two goals.Firstly they portray the damage that can be caused by our uncontrollable behavior.They provide a simulation.As humans when we put ourselves in that spot we learn a lot about suffering.Secondly negative emotions when shown by others become an alert signal for us to escape.If a part of the body has been diseased we have to amputate.But that does not happen.Both these cases are not so commonly followed by people.Animals blindly follow natures cues.They don't question.They are obedient servants.Humans are blessed with a calculative and logical mind.Our preferences/ attachments and our desire to mould every situation to our own benefit puts us on the wrong side.We miss the path of growing and evolving into a strong independent person because we are so convinced that things will always go our way.

Meditation ramblings

When you are meditating lot of questions start arising.Not that they were not there before.Its likes having a endless conversation with a person who never gets tired.Lately I have come to realize that most of my meditation sessions are problem solving sessions.Its like having a one hour meeting where present problems are spoken out.The past traumas and fears take control once I am done with the present moment.Then there is the desires of having a glorious future.Underneath all these is the intention of finding the truth.

The solution does not lie in running away or sacrificing everything.The mind will create fantasies from emptiness and peace Sometimes I feel that unless we understand the problems,we can never meditate and achieve inner clarity.The root of our problems may be the same.A situation when analysed from all angles may give us enough knowledge to overcome lot of the mental barriers.Sometimes I go through phases where I cannot meditate for weeks.
"I can force myself to meditate".
That would be a possible solution... but repressing the mental defilement's can cause them to explode with greater force.Meditation should only be used for developing the inner know-how of our mind.Unless we take a leap and put efforts to grow,the practice will never reap any benefits.The practice itself moves like a sine wave.The highs of mental bliss and the lows of confusion have to be accepted without any complaints