Advice is supposed to help people.I have got into more problems,giving advice.My intentions are always to provide the right judgment for the situation.But it so happens that it has always backfired.Most of the time we have made up our minds to do what we want.When we ask for a suggestion, we just want the last bit of motivation to take the jump into our own desired path.When I think deeply about giving advice I also feel my insignificance.
Who am I to make decisions for someone else?
Over the years I have also learnt to accept the fact that I really dont know,the right answer.I can give advice on buying a birthday gift.But I somehow feel that giving advice on "life-problems" is scary.
One of the easiest ways of imparting required advice is to start the advice with
"If I was in your situation ....I would have done this..."
This is one of the easiest ways of being responsible while giving advice.You dont tell the person you are going to solve the problem.But you show them a way, that you would have approached it.
The most important thing in giving advice is empathy.Sometimes I have tried to put myself in the persons shoes and walk around and examine what they are going through.This is very helpful when giving advice to a person who is ill.When the body is weak,logic fails.Physical pain is far more stronger than your voice or your actions.
Every person has their own pace and cannot be hurried up.Sometimes not helping someone may be the best help.
Saturday, August 30, 2008
Thursday, August 28, 2008
Wisdom
Wisdom has its own natural curve..There are no schools which can teach you how to get wise.Growing old makes us wise.The levels may not be the same but it makes everyone little more wiser.But the basic problem comes with conditioning.There is always a internal war going between conditioning and wisdom.The conditioning says you to react to situations taking inputs from the past.But wisdom diverts you in a different way.
Knowledge is also obtained through conditioning.That is the reason a person with a higher degree does not automatically develop wisdom to deal with situations.Knowledge is centered on the application.Wisdom is universal.A wise person may implement their experience into absolutely everything.But a knowlegable person(say for example a electrical engineer) can only work in that particular field.A wise enginner can make feasible solutions without going against nature(Example:Sustainable models). A knowledgable engineer will waste half of earth resources making stupid devices which are upgraded every second.(Example:Cell Phone)
Knowledge is also obtained through conditioning.That is the reason a person with a higher degree does not automatically develop wisdom to deal with situations.Knowledge is centered on the application.Wisdom is universal.A wise person may implement their experience into absolutely everything.But a knowlegable person(say for example a electrical engineer) can only work in that particular field.A wise enginner can make feasible solutions without going against nature(Example:Sustainable models). A knowledgable engineer will waste half of earth resources making stupid devices which are upgraded every second.(Example:Cell Phone)
Sunday, August 10, 2008
Giving and receiving
Giving is always portrayed as something really great.Receiving on the other hand is shown as being meek.Charity is taken as a virtue and the people who we are being charitable to is shown with sympathy.Asking makes us feel small.Ancient monks were made to beg for food.Whatever was given to them was to be taken with a smile of gratitude.Asking breaks down the pride of ownership we have and also things we can control.I have always suffered from great displeasure when it comes to taking favors.I feel uneasy even to ask people for help when I need it.Life cannot be lived in isolation and we need support from others for our own well being.I have tried to cultivate the value of giving but I forgot to cultivate the value of receiving.When I ask something my mind creates a divide between me and the person I ask from.There is a sudden comparison mode my mind steps into.I feel smaller and the person who provides me help becomes a larger than life figure.
Why cant my mind accept that even that person requires help from other people?
Then if the person rejects the offer and not help me,my mind gets into condemning and steps into the zone of lower self worth.As our own worth ceases to exist in trivial emotions and beliefs,the less we will get effected by the outside.
Why cant my mind accept that even that person requires help from other people?
Then if the person rejects the offer and not help me,my mind gets into condemning and steps into the zone of lower self worth.As our own worth ceases to exist in trivial emotions and beliefs,the less we will get effected by the outside.
Friday, August 08, 2008
Are we alike...
I have always tried to be politically correct.I have used rational ideas and logic to stand by my beliefs.On the one hand we have such high ideals that we propose and it would be a total different story when we have to act according to it.I have had the fortunate experience of working with people from different countries.My colleagues at work are from diverse backgrounds.They are from Pakistan,Ethiopia,China,Nepal,Mexico and America.When I talk to them and share experiences I don't feel the difference.We talk at how our cultures vary,but I guess the perspective matters.I try to learn a lot about their culture and initially there is some hesitation.The breakthrough for real good conversation and starting of good friendships occurs when the barriers of color and race are broken by human emotions.When my colleagues share their expectations,fears and joys I know they are exactly like me.Underneath our differences we are same.When we want to see similarity ..we see it everywhere..When we want to see differences...we see it everywhere...Our mind is a tool...we should try to use it in the right way.
Thursday, July 31, 2008
Fame
When a beautiful flower blooms,somewhere in the amazon forest..Who observes that!!!
Trees which grow for hundreds of years,who notices their birthdays?
But why is that humans have a deep desire to get noticed.Every time we achieve something,we feel dejected ...if we don't get the required credit.Fame is transient and lasts only for a while.Celebrities do everything to hold on to their image.In everyday life people try to get noticed and do everything so that all the people around them keep buzzing their name.
Too many useless friends/relationships,wealth,personality traits and many more attributes can be used to become popular.The desire to get noticed and accepted by the other creates most of the problems.The "other" always effects us.
We wonder what "others" will say about us and we want to be superior to "others".Advertisements,standards set by society(economic and religious),moral values and also our own goals.The only way to kill the others mentality is to become aware of our intentions and motives.Does our desire and motivation come from within us?
Are our intentions worthy enough?
Answers to these questions may shatter away relationships.Personally I still fight with the "other" everyday.I still try to live away my life according to my inner motivation.But still a wave comes along and takes me away to the "others" world...
Trees which grow for hundreds of years,who notices their birthdays?
But why is that humans have a deep desire to get noticed.Every time we achieve something,we feel dejected ...if we don't get the required credit.Fame is transient and lasts only for a while.Celebrities do everything to hold on to their image.In everyday life people try to get noticed and do everything so that all the people around them keep buzzing their name.
Too many useless friends/relationships,wealth,personality traits and many more attributes can be used to become popular.The desire to get noticed and accepted by the other creates most of the problems.The "other" always effects us.
We wonder what "others" will say about us and we want to be superior to "others".Advertisements,standards set by society(economic and religious),moral values and also our own goals.The only way to kill the others mentality is to become aware of our intentions and motives.Does our desire and motivation come from within us?
Are our intentions worthy enough?
Answers to these questions may shatter away relationships.Personally I still fight with the "other" everyday.I still try to live away my life according to my inner motivation.But still a wave comes along and takes me away to the "others" world...
Wednesday, July 23, 2008
How honest can you get.........
Lately I have been thinking, how instantly we tell "yes" to people around us.May be at work,with family and friends,it becomes easy to mumble a "yes..I will surely do it"
But most of the time I wonder whether we have the capacity to do all that we promise.If you tell "no",then the person will be offended.If you agree to it and not do it..the person gets more offended.In one of the situations,when my friend asked me something,I was honest and told "no".Now we are not on talking terms... and I still stand by my ideals.
I confessed ,my hatred for neatness and order... to my boss.
This may look like professional and personal suicide,but the truth is, I am so relived.I don't want to make promises to anyone.I am tired of faking smiles and giving idle hope to people around me.I confess to my weakness more easily and also praise myself when needed.The doormat attitude of being nice is outdated.I think it takes more courage to say "no" and let no person run over you.Kindness,charity and helping others is important,but our own dharma/duty should be our highest priority.
But most of the time I wonder whether we have the capacity to do all that we promise.If you tell "no",then the person will be offended.If you agree to it and not do it..the person gets more offended.In one of the situations,when my friend asked me something,I was honest and told "no".Now we are not on talking terms... and I still stand by my ideals.
I confessed ,my hatred for neatness and order... to my boss.
This may look like professional and personal suicide,but the truth is, I am so relived.I don't want to make promises to anyone.I am tired of faking smiles and giving idle hope to people around me.I confess to my weakness more easily and also praise myself when needed.The doormat attitude of being nice is outdated.I think it takes more courage to say "no" and let no person run over you.Kindness,charity and helping others is important,but our own dharma/duty should be our highest priority.
Wednesday, July 16, 2008
The Economics of Relationships…
The base of a relationship is mutual self-interest. We fall in love with a person who exactly does what we want him/her to do. Our minds have set up a certain ideal for the person. The individual has to fit into that mold. When they do something different or do something contrary to our opinions then we begin to hate them. Our own ideal, which we set up, keeps changing. Our criteria keeps getting manipulated by our fickle mind. People …...to our minds are nothing but objects. We can build holy concepts around people,but when it boils down to a relationship, it is pure economics. There is nothing wrong with this idea. Many people think its crude and shun such ideas of looking at a relationship. They always want to look at life through fairy tale glasses. The motto of every business organization is that the customer has to be kept happy. They treat customers with respect and successful business-people treat customers and fellow employees with respect. But in a relationship most of the time even economical standards don’t work. Most of the people who exist in a committed relationship take the other person for granted, don’t keep them happy and forget about respect and trust. A successful business enterprise guarantees good quality of the product and their long life. A good relationship should guarantee long life and also mutual happiness.
Only two independent people can have a good relationship.
Any emotional/financial/physical dependence makes the relationship into a parasite paradise.One would dominate(mostly men) and other becomes submissive(mostly women)..this has been a trend which has continued for centuries.Even though initially parasite-relationships look as if they work,in the long run they break down.
The woman who has no image of her own and she starts searching for something to fulfill her.She lives vicariously through her children.She tries to dominate and subject the kids to all her dreams.The kids end up with psychological problems and they torture their kids and the vicious circle of doom continues.The man on the other hand tries to exercise the power on all levels.Some guys with huge complexes/self esteem issues, try to marry a girl who is quite young.They also try to choose a spouse who is not educated.Somehow they feel that, they can run the girl's life.For such guys a pet dog would be the right choice.They can train the dog more easily.
No amount of wealth and material luxuries patch up the imbalance between the man and the woman in a parasite relationship.
Only two independent people can have a good relationship.
Any emotional/financial/physical dependence makes the relationship into a parasite paradise.One would dominate(mostly men) and other becomes submissive(mostly women)..this has been a trend which has continued for centuries.Even though initially parasite-relationships look as if they work,in the long run they break down.
The woman who has no image of her own and she starts searching for something to fulfill her.She lives vicariously through her children.She tries to dominate and subject the kids to all her dreams.The kids end up with psychological problems and they torture their kids and the vicious circle of doom continues.The man on the other hand tries to exercise the power on all levels.Some guys with huge complexes/self esteem issues, try to marry a girl who is quite young.They also try to choose a spouse who is not educated.Somehow they feel that, they can run the girl's life.For such guys a pet dog would be the right choice.They can train the dog more easily.
No amount of wealth and material luxuries patch up the imbalance between the man and the woman in a parasite relationship.
Thursday, July 10, 2008
Progression
How can we judge whether or not we have improved in our life?
There are few theories, which say that there is no ultimate transformation and there is no need to change ourselves. But I feel that because of our illusions that we create,we change ourselves from the perfect state.To return to our original form is transformation.We have to use the relative mind and the changing reality to define ourselves.Even though it is quite clear that we continuously change every second.We set up ideals which we think lasts for a longer time.All virtues and vices which we possess cannot exist.One way to judge progess is to see how much the mind fluctuates between misery and happiness.When we accept both and not complain or if we decrease the amount of cribbing we do,we start progressing towards better mental health.The second way of judging would be how attached or possessive we are to things and people.
There are few theories, which say that there is no ultimate transformation and there is no need to change ourselves. But I feel that because of our illusions that we create,we change ourselves from the perfect state.To return to our original form is transformation.We have to use the relative mind and the changing reality to define ourselves.Even though it is quite clear that we continuously change every second.We set up ideals which we think lasts for a longer time.All virtues and vices which we possess cannot exist.One way to judge progess is to see how much the mind fluctuates between misery and happiness.When we accept both and not complain or if we decrease the amount of cribbing we do,we start progressing towards better mental health.The second way of judging would be how attached or possessive we are to things and people.
Wednesday, June 25, 2008
Fear
Fear is a natural response.
I think we all need fear to survive.If we are not scared of wild animals or natural calamities we will be hunted and killed by them.Even though the world popularizes foolish ideals of bravery like jumping of bridges or doing dare devil stunts,the real battles in life are completely different.Matters pertaining to principles can storm our life and create a mess.No amount of physical danger which we have experienced and learnt from, can teach you how to face the danger which leaps within us.I can go on expeditions to mountains and amazing forests,but nothing would prepare me once I turn inward.The amount of mistakes, we commit,are far more greater than what we face in the outer reality.Diseases,worries,phobias and other demons which lurk inside us can affect us and the pain we get from them cannot be escaped.
Christopher Reeves in his biography describes how he had the wrong ideas of bravery.As a “superman”,he did all his stunts and was so confident that life could not break him or scare him.A small accident ,when he went for riding bought his life to a stop.
I think we all need fear to survive.If we are not scared of wild animals or natural calamities we will be hunted and killed by them.Even though the world popularizes foolish ideals of bravery like jumping of bridges or doing dare devil stunts,the real battles in life are completely different.Matters pertaining to principles can storm our life and create a mess.No amount of physical danger which we have experienced and learnt from, can teach you how to face the danger which leaps within us.I can go on expeditions to mountains and amazing forests,but nothing would prepare me once I turn inward.The amount of mistakes, we commit,are far more greater than what we face in the outer reality.Diseases,worries,phobias and other demons which lurk inside us can affect us and the pain we get from them cannot be escaped.
Christopher Reeves in his biography describes how he had the wrong ideas of bravery.As a “superman”,he did all his stunts and was so confident that life could not break him or scare him.A small accident ,when he went for riding bought his life to a stop.
Saturday, June 14, 2008
What is Maya
Narada once asked Krishna …
Lord, show me Maya…
Few days passed away, Krishna asked Narada to take a trip with him to the desert.
After walking a few miles,Krishna tells Narada that he is thirsty.He asks Narada to fetch some water for him.Narada obliges and starts searching for a house where he can find water for his master.At the distant horizon, Narada could find see a well built house.He knocks on the door..A beautiful young girl opens the door.He gets mesmerized by her beauty.He starts talking to her.As the days pass by ,the talks lead to love.Narada approaches her father and asks his daughters hand for marriage.The father was overjoyed and made him a partner in the family business.As years pass by,Narada and his wife live happily.Narada's life gets filled with happiness.He becomes a proud father of two children.After his father in law passes away,Narada inherits the business and all the associated property.Twelve years roll by and there was a huge flood which strikes the desert.The beautiful house crumbles down.Narada places one of his children on his shoulders,holds the other child's hand and with also holds the hand of the trembling wife.As the force of the water pushes the child who was sitting on the shoulder, a cry of despair arises from Narada's heart.In shock he places his hands on his face and starts crying. His wife and his other child get swept away by the rushing water.
He starts crying wildly and screams for Krishna ….
Krishna appears before him ..He asks Narada whether he could find some water for him.It has been half an hour and Krishna was thirsty.Narada tells Krishna that it was 12 years and not half an hour …Then Krishna says
"This is Maya"
Lord, show me Maya…
Few days passed away, Krishna asked Narada to take a trip with him to the desert.
After walking a few miles,Krishna tells Narada that he is thirsty.He asks Narada to fetch some water for him.Narada obliges and starts searching for a house where he can find water for his master.At the distant horizon, Narada could find see a well built house.He knocks on the door..A beautiful young girl opens the door.He gets mesmerized by her beauty.He starts talking to her.As the days pass by ,the talks lead to love.Narada approaches her father and asks his daughters hand for marriage.The father was overjoyed and made him a partner in the family business.As years pass by,Narada and his wife live happily.Narada's life gets filled with happiness.He becomes a proud father of two children.After his father in law passes away,Narada inherits the business and all the associated property.Twelve years roll by and there was a huge flood which strikes the desert.The beautiful house crumbles down.Narada places one of his children on his shoulders,holds the other child's hand and with also holds the hand of the trembling wife.As the force of the water pushes the child who was sitting on the shoulder, a cry of despair arises from Narada's heart.In shock he places his hands on his face and starts crying. His wife and his other child get swept away by the rushing water.
He starts crying wildly and screams for Krishna ….
Krishna appears before him ..He asks Narada whether he could find some water for him.It has been half an hour and Krishna was thirsty.Narada tells Krishna that it was 12 years and not half an hour …Then Krishna says
"This is Maya"
Thursday, June 12, 2008
Insignificance and its Implications
If I die today…it does not make any difference.I am not a pessimist.We are like components in a huge machine.If I die I will get replaced …quite easily.The company where I work,will hire someone else.My desk will be given away...My laptop will also be donated to some poor soul,who has been fighting with a desktop for a long time.My parents will miss me …but time will surely make them forget..The same it is with few of my friends also.
I remember a scene from the movie Matrix…A screen full of numbers..each number is a person…If you disappear,the system doesn't shut down.A new person will take the number.
I remember a scene from the movie Matrix…A screen full of numbers..each number is a person…If you disappear,the system doesn't shut down.A new person will take the number.
Sunday, June 08, 2008
Only Religious People SWEAR
The art of using "Fuck" in everyday conversation
By Osho
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6D7rWLzloOI
When I was younger, I would have swear-ed with pride,if things did not go my way.Now that I am a adult..I am not able to swear...Its a handicap...if you are single,8-5 working slave for a big corporation.If you are religious, all the swear words which shall be used...would be related to sexual activity,so any words used at your enemies would give you immense pleasure.....as they would rot in hell because of bad sexual misconduct.
When you are not religious you know that there is no heaven or hell and no God..Then if you assault a person by saying "Fuck you"...Its a blessing in disguise,so that their desperate desires get fulfilled fast.
By Osho
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6D7rWLzloOI
When I was younger, I would have swear-ed with pride,if things did not go my way.Now that I am a adult..I am not able to swear...Its a handicap...if you are single,8-5 working slave for a big corporation.If you are religious, all the swear words which shall be used...would be related to sexual activity,so any words used at your enemies would give you immense pleasure.....as they would rot in hell because of bad sexual misconduct.
When you are not religious you know that there is no heaven or hell and no God..Then if you assault a person by saying "Fuck you"...Its a blessing in disguise,so that their desperate desires get fulfilled fast.
Saturday, May 31, 2008
Idealism is CRAP
There is only ANGER and more ANGER when I meet people who dont meet up my expectations.My own ideals of..how life should be,has caused me all the misery.I blame the books and the movies and the millions of songs which have promised me a perfect world.How I wish sometimes that all countries become a bunch of communists and they shoot up all artists and all people who dream.In the process even I would be dead..But then again I wont commit the crime of doing something creative(when I am dead).
This post is in direct response to the news..I watch on Television, during my lunch break...at work.Drugs,murder,sexual abuse,environmental hazards,crap,shit,everything included and many more..I complained how the world was bad..then I realized that the only solution was to not watch the news anymore.Shut it out and there are no problems.Thats the dumbest and the easiest way.I don't have all the answers...Nor do I give a DAMN to question...
This post is in direct response to the news..I watch on Television, during my lunch break...at work.Drugs,murder,sexual abuse,environmental hazards,crap,shit,everything included and many more..I complained how the world was bad..then I realized that the only solution was to not watch the news anymore.Shut it out and there are no problems.Thats the dumbest and the easiest way.I don't have all the answers...Nor do I give a DAMN to question...
Activity is an excuse
All activities in life spring out of boredom..UG Krishnamurti said it right ..when he said that the purpose of the body is to have Food and F***
The life we have ,revolves around making money.Thats what everyone does.All our lives are filled with this great purpose of making ourselves feel better using money or any other activity.
One of the most basic problems in life is boredom.Once we start getting adjusted to a place or a new life we just get bored.Life is a series of repetitions and more repetitions.
Everything is the same.
I was once reading a book called Meditations by Marcus Aurelius (the roman emperor…(shown as) …The old king in Gladiator who wanted Russell Crowe to take the crown)The book Meditations is not a book on Meditation as the name suggests.It is a book which contains the thoughts of the emperor.It was the king's wish that it should never be published.The easiest way of getting any book published is to tell people around you, not to publish it.The moment the king died..his books were published.He is worried about the world and how people behave.All his problems are identical to the problems we face now-a-days..So nothing has changed.All minds are alike.All people suffer from the same problems.Our mind gets bored and wants something to grab.If there are no problems then we create problems.My problems have not changed either.The same questions I had years back still linger on.I wanted to be a scientist and solve few of the problems.But science has no answers just random assumptions.Science loves complexity…and if you search for complexity …it exits everywhere.
I lost my faith in religion..then I discovered science..I lost my faith in science I discovered…spirituality..
I lost my faith in spirituality and I discovered..how foolish I was to have faith on anything in the first place..
I think the band Linkin Park got it right ,when they sang "At the end …it doesn't matter"
The life we have ,revolves around making money.Thats what everyone does.All our lives are filled with this great purpose of making ourselves feel better using money or any other activity.
One of the most basic problems in life is boredom.Once we start getting adjusted to a place or a new life we just get bored.Life is a series of repetitions and more repetitions.
Everything is the same.
I was once reading a book called Meditations by Marcus Aurelius (the roman emperor…(shown as) …The old king in Gladiator who wanted Russell Crowe to take the crown)The book Meditations is not a book on Meditation as the name suggests.It is a book which contains the thoughts of the emperor.It was the king's wish that it should never be published.The easiest way of getting any book published is to tell people around you, not to publish it.The moment the king died..his books were published.He is worried about the world and how people behave.All his problems are identical to the problems we face now-a-days..So nothing has changed.All minds are alike.All people suffer from the same problems.Our mind gets bored and wants something to grab.If there are no problems then we create problems.My problems have not changed either.The same questions I had years back still linger on.I wanted to be a scientist and solve few of the problems.But science has no answers just random assumptions.Science loves complexity…and if you search for complexity …it exits everywhere.
I lost my faith in religion..then I discovered science..I lost my faith in science I discovered…spirituality..
I lost my faith in spirituality and I discovered..how foolish I was to have faith on anything in the first place..
I think the band Linkin Park got it right ,when they sang "At the end …it doesn't matter"
Saturday, May 24, 2008
Don’t Turn Back and see
There seems no way I can remember what I was yesterday
Everything has vanished in one day
There seems no end to this whole misery
Which has crept into me today
I told myself I wont look back
But I turn around and look anyways!!!
Everything has vanished in one day
There seems no end to this whole misery
Which has crept into me today
I told myself I wont look back
But I turn around and look anyways!!!
Thursday, May 08, 2008
Hope
The only way to have hope in life is to be hope-less.
Why should we be positive and expect all the "good" things happen to us.What is the use of going to a place of worship and begging favors from God.Wont God bestow equal favors on everyone.If as a student I write my exam badly and pray to God to pass me...Then there is the professor who is also praying to God and saying that he should grade the papers properly so that there are no cases against him for his negligence.So on who's side will God be.Whatever happens does not happen for the good..It just happens...Having a positive image in our mind we compare our miserable situation with the positive image.The image keeps changing and like a dog we keep running back of it.But I dont think there will any end to it.Having the expectation that the running will stop is also a expectation.That also gives us hope.
Why should we be positive and expect all the "good" things happen to us.What is the use of going to a place of worship and begging favors from God.Wont God bestow equal favors on everyone.If as a student I write my exam badly and pray to God to pass me...Then there is the professor who is also praying to God and saying that he should grade the papers properly so that there are no cases against him for his negligence.So on who's side will God be.Whatever happens does not happen for the good..It just happens...Having a positive image in our mind we compare our miserable situation with the positive image.The image keeps changing and like a dog we keep running back of it.But I dont think there will any end to it.Having the expectation that the running will stop is also a expectation.That also gives us hope.
Friday, May 02, 2008
Social Change
I want the world to change according to my own petty fancies.I want to wipe poverty,AIDS and cancer.I want to educate millions of poor girls in India.
"There is no need to worry …I am not joining Indian politics "
My Experience with service was as follows…
1.Kindness - My kindness experiments went down the drain as I belive my nature itself is that of anger...I have complaints against everyone.Trying to force kindness on myself was like the experience people would have if they are in a dentist's chair.
2 Feeling better- My ego always gets a good boost .Whenever I do some service ,I develop a halo around my head…for the next few days.Its so shocking how people waste loads of money on creams to get the glow.
3.Influence of Mother Teresa/Gandhi –I was hypnotized early on by Gandhi.He had a stronger hold on my mind than my parents.Even though I was a engineer,deep down somewhere I belived that the spinning wheel can save the world.The things people can do to you from the grave is scary.
Mother Teresa was a huge influence on me.The fact that she donated a apple at an young age was something which blew my minds off.When I was young I used to hide chocolates from everyone.I was denied admission in a school because of my excessive attachments to choclates.So whenever I used to serve I used to feel like I was one step closer in becoming Mother Teresa.The silly thing was I can never become like Mother Teresa because she was a Norwegian and I am a Indian.So all my efforts at donating money,biscuts,books to become like her, went out of the window because of citizenship problems.
4.Depression
If I suffered from Depression I used to volunteer.When I used to see other people in worser conditions I used to help them.I felt better because they were miserable.Poverty actually cured my depression.
5.Conversation
Volunteer service becomes a good topic for breaking the ice…whenever I meet strangers on flights etc..
God/Temples are good ice breakers too.I have zero knowledge about both so I always chose volunteer service as conversation starters
6 Employment
It can also be seen internship experience by employers.(I added it in my resume)
7.Food/other benefits
Normally you get fed really well by organizations if you are volunteering.You may get some free stuff too.Temples in USA have that advantage too.Most of the time I meet people who are religions,they tell me of the greatness of Dosa or different varieties of rice available.One temple I personally recommend for good Tamil food is Meenakshi Temple in Houston.I am yet to meet "religious"people who tell me about God or about mental peace they obtained when they went to a temple.
If temples should have more attendance I feel they should open a Mc.Donalds outlet there.
8.Well Behaved People:
You meet nicer people.Even if they have deep hate for you, they smile outwardly because everyone is working for a good cause which can make the world a better place.
Personally I feel the very need to serve, if got from the desire to feel better about yourself …..Is the worst desire a human can have.
We always want to feel better and become superior to others.Sympathy/pity/empathy and all these emotions are not strong enough to motivate a person to serve.If they were strong enough then the world wont have so many problems.Every single time we serve its like filling a bottomless tank with water.Its gone …Its wasted…There is no difference done.When this idea really sinks into us that we don't make a difference then it's the best kind of service.The ego does not claim its greatness and you don't become a super kind individual suffering for the world.After realizing this,if there is still a desire to serve,then I guess service would be a right path....
"There is no need to worry …I am not joining Indian politics "
My Experience with service was as follows…
1.Kindness - My kindness experiments went down the drain as I belive my nature itself is that of anger...I have complaints against everyone.Trying to force kindness on myself was like the experience people would have if they are in a dentist's chair.
2 Feeling better- My ego always gets a good boost .Whenever I do some service ,I develop a halo around my head…for the next few days.Its so shocking how people waste loads of money on creams to get the glow.
3.Influence of Mother Teresa/Gandhi –I was hypnotized early on by Gandhi.He had a stronger hold on my mind than my parents.Even though I was a engineer,deep down somewhere I belived that the spinning wheel can save the world.The things people can do to you from the grave is scary.
Mother Teresa was a huge influence on me.The fact that she donated a apple at an young age was something which blew my minds off.When I was young I used to hide chocolates from everyone.I was denied admission in a school because of my excessive attachments to choclates.So whenever I used to serve I used to feel like I was one step closer in becoming Mother Teresa.The silly thing was I can never become like Mother Teresa because she was a Norwegian and I am a Indian.So all my efforts at donating money,biscuts,books to become like her, went out of the window because of citizenship problems.
4.Depression
If I suffered from Depression I used to volunteer.When I used to see other people in worser conditions I used to help them.I felt better because they were miserable.Poverty actually cured my depression.
5.Conversation
Volunteer service becomes a good topic for breaking the ice…whenever I meet strangers on flights etc..
God/Temples are good ice breakers too.I have zero knowledge about both so I always chose volunteer service as conversation starters
6 Employment
It can also be seen internship experience by employers.(I added it in my resume)
7.Food/other benefits
Normally you get fed really well by organizations if you are volunteering.You may get some free stuff too.Temples in USA have that advantage too.Most of the time I meet people who are religions,they tell me of the greatness of Dosa or different varieties of rice available.One temple I personally recommend for good Tamil food is Meenakshi Temple in Houston.I am yet to meet "religious"people who tell me about God or about mental peace they obtained when they went to a temple.
If temples should have more attendance I feel they should open a Mc.Donalds outlet there.
8.Well Behaved People:
You meet nicer people.Even if they have deep hate for you, they smile outwardly because everyone is working for a good cause which can make the world a better place.
Personally I feel the very need to serve, if got from the desire to feel better about yourself …..Is the worst desire a human can have.
We always want to feel better and become superior to others.Sympathy/pity/empathy and all these emotions are not strong enough to motivate a person to serve.If they were strong enough then the world wont have so many problems.Every single time we serve its like filling a bottomless tank with water.Its gone …Its wasted…There is no difference done.When this idea really sinks into us that we don't make a difference then it's the best kind of service.The ego does not claim its greatness and you don't become a super kind individual suffering for the world.After realizing this,if there is still a desire to serve,then I guess service would be a right path....
Monday, April 28, 2008
Overcoming Depression
I get depressed for various reasons…Sometimes it is because of the weather conditions.Constant sunshine cheers me up.So when I stayed at Texas for the past two years it was really nice.Even if I was terribly depressed …the nature around me lifted my spirits.I cannot bear cold/freezing/rainy/hailing/snowing places…They make me gloomy.As if fate wanted me to learn a lesson ,I am working at a place which hardly sees the sun.There is sunshine for only few hours in a week at the maximum…To make it more pleasant for me , this year my place is skipping summer.
There are lot of ways to overcome depression.Most of them are external stimuli given to you in a nice package.I have followed lot of these techniques to get out of depressed states.Only two good solutions have worked out for me.First is community service.When we see others suffering …our suffering looks so tiny in comparison.The second method is the "stupid method".Love depression and stay clam.It will leave you eventually.Either depression leaves or your body leaves.(Inappropriate joke!!! )
If you are the kind of person who has seen intense depression then it is evident, that our mind goes in predictable cycles.We get bogged down for some general scenarios.For me it is moral/ethical/justice oriented values.If I am stuck in a problem in which someone else does not take a right moral stand ..it makes me deeply angry.In the same way , I guess everyone in the world has something which turns them off.But if you are served the same scenario with different people and few more complexities added in ..we get vexed and then ultimately slip into depression.There are also other reasons for depression ..like death,financial crisis,spiritual crisis,boredom,loneliness,too many people around to bug you…etc..
To raise higher than our thoughts/emotions is a very difficult process.To reach a level where we neglect our thought process is even more difficult.This is the reason why positive statements don't make us very happy when we are depressed.It helps you a little bit by giving hope but it does not cure you.Positive thoughts are fed to the mind and we can train the mind to be positive for a while but once the mind gets de-hypnotized it slips back into a depressive state.The only thing which helps us is Action.You may have a thought which says that you are worthless, but then again you can act your way towards success. The body cannot take severe emotions.It gets agitated and becomes weak.We can get affected by severe diseases and sometimes even tumors/cancers are a result of deep depression.(Subject to speculation…All medical studies are bound to change every two hours)
Mental analysis rarely cure depression.If they could cure, then psychotherapists would have been billionaires.(they have become millionaires!!!).I don't see any reason why we have this ideal in our head that life one day will be without problems.Even Buddha made it clear that "Life is suffering" and the only way out for him was meditation and acceptance of impermanence.The only foolproof way to combat depression is to work diligently even when we are not depressed.To constantly check our motives and our expectations.To let it go when the time comes.No regrets, no grievances.
There are lot of ways to overcome depression.Most of them are external stimuli given to you in a nice package.I have followed lot of these techniques to get out of depressed states.Only two good solutions have worked out for me.First is community service.When we see others suffering …our suffering looks so tiny in comparison.The second method is the "stupid method".Love depression and stay clam.It will leave you eventually.Either depression leaves or your body leaves.(Inappropriate joke!!! )
If you are the kind of person who has seen intense depression then it is evident, that our mind goes in predictable cycles.We get bogged down for some general scenarios.For me it is moral/ethical/justice oriented values.If I am stuck in a problem in which someone else does not take a right moral stand ..it makes me deeply angry.In the same way , I guess everyone in the world has something which turns them off.But if you are served the same scenario with different people and few more complexities added in ..we get vexed and then ultimately slip into depression.There are also other reasons for depression ..like death,financial crisis,spiritual crisis,boredom,loneliness,too many people around to bug you…etc..
To raise higher than our thoughts/emotions is a very difficult process.To reach a level where we neglect our thought process is even more difficult.This is the reason why positive statements don't make us very happy when we are depressed.It helps you a little bit by giving hope but it does not cure you.Positive thoughts are fed to the mind and we can train the mind to be positive for a while but once the mind gets de-hypnotized it slips back into a depressive state.The only thing which helps us is Action.You may have a thought which says that you are worthless, but then again you can act your way towards success. The body cannot take severe emotions.It gets agitated and becomes weak.We can get affected by severe diseases and sometimes even tumors/cancers are a result of deep depression.(Subject to speculation…All medical studies are bound to change every two hours)
Mental analysis rarely cure depression.If they could cure, then psychotherapists would have been billionaires.(they have become millionaires!!!).I don't see any reason why we have this ideal in our head that life one day will be without problems.Even Buddha made it clear that "Life is suffering" and the only way out for him was meditation and acceptance of impermanence.The only foolproof way to combat depression is to work diligently even when we are not depressed.To constantly check our motives and our expectations.To let it go when the time comes.No regrets, no grievances.
Sunday, April 27, 2008
My blog
I thank everyone who take the time to read and comment on my blog.If anyone looks at the series of the posts it revolves on the following themes..
1.Birth/Death
2.Desire
3.Thought/Knowledge/Emotion
4.Devotion/Service/Realization
5.Practical Implications of Advaita Vedanta/Buddhism
6.Social Issues(Dealing with India)
The theories of Advaita and Buddhism may look contradictory.Adviata hits directly on the issues of Moksha whereas Buddhism deals with the issues related to the body/emotions/thoughts.
All paths lead to the truth.Anything which is false ...will fall away eventually.I wanted to honestly write about what I feel/believe/imagine...In no way ...I say that, I have knowledge about scriptures of any religion/path.What I write should always be taken as spiritual entertainment.
I have no strong hold on the English vocabulary/grammar..most of my posts will have huge errors..Language is always a barrier and so are words...Words have no use...As is the case with silence...
1.Birth/Death
2.Desire
3.Thought/Knowledge/Emotion
4.Devotion/Service/Realization
5.Practical Implications of Advaita Vedanta/Buddhism
6.Social Issues(Dealing with India)
The theories of Advaita and Buddhism may look contradictory.Adviata hits directly on the issues of Moksha whereas Buddhism deals with the issues related to the body/emotions/thoughts.
All paths lead to the truth.Anything which is false ...will fall away eventually.I wanted to honestly write about what I feel/believe/imagine...In no way ...I say that, I have knowledge about scriptures of any religion/path.What I write should always be taken as spiritual entertainment.
I have no strong hold on the English vocabulary/grammar..most of my posts will have huge errors..Language is always a barrier and so are words...Words have no use...As is the case with silence...
Old age/death
Its so amazing how we think and plan for the future as if we are going to last forever.But the truth is any moment we may leave away everything.Sometimes this truth deeply sinks into me and I start grabbing all my ambitions and try to calculate what I have done.But death is the best remedy for all of us.It wipes our slates clean.To think about future for me looks like a pain because I am constantly aware that death sits on my shoulder.It may look like a pessimistic view on life that I associate my future with death.But it occurs at so many levels...Only thing is our society gives so much importance to being young...that we forget death...
In ancient times death/old age was given its due respect.In Indian tradition we respect every old person as a wise person..even if he/she is a beggar/cheat...I find stillness and divinity in older people faces.Its quite opposite to popular culture ...that I find old people faces attractive.Starting from my grandmother,I used to feel each wrinkle on her face is a testimonial of the hardships and the joy she has seen in her life...Old is always gold...
In ancient times death/old age was given its due respect.In Indian tradition we respect every old person as a wise person..even if he/she is a beggar/cheat...I find stillness and divinity in older people faces.Its quite opposite to popular culture ...that I find old people faces attractive.Starting from my grandmother,I used to feel each wrinkle on her face is a testimonial of the hardships and the joy she has seen in her life...Old is always gold...
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