Fear

The preconceived thought process stops us from attaining what we truly deserve to get.This thought process is called as FEAR.We suffer and we torture ourselves with hundreds of possible outcomes for a single obstacle we come across.Even a super computer cannot claculate the abrupt posssiblities we think of.But the mind is nothing but a logical device and the thought is nothing but the output we obtain.The concept of fearlessness in certain situations is quite possible.Fear can be destroyed by using few simple techniques.First we have to understand the limitness of our physical existence.In our own finiteness the fear looks even more small and ignorable.But our deep seated insecurities of life like trust,security,loyality and love can only be erased when we unconditionally give this to everyone.

Enviornment and its conditions

Are we subjected to conditioning everyday. Many will agree that the reason we behave and act in a certain way is because of conditions based on “n” number of environmental factors. Starting from the country we are born into, the parents we are born to, our educational pursuits, our freinds,our enemies,our careers,the money we have, and the list can go on forver.We never trust other people because someone cheated us.We dont share our happiness because in the past we got only pain.We hurt ourselves because we feel we don’t deserve good things in life.We sacrifice for foolish reasons.

I truly beleive that saints are not born in luxury.There is this false assumption in us that we cannot escape our own conditions.But if we study the past and trace all the greatness which was born out of suffering we will be amazed.Life has a meaning even though we suffer.The tragedies don't stop us from realizing who we are.We in our minds and hearts make up obsatcles which stop us.Victor Frankyl,Nelson Mandela,Mother teresa and many more people can be taken as examples in this regard.

If God can be found in the houses of the poorest of the poor .
If prisons and concentration camps can give you hope to live till you are 100 .
I don't know why psychologists and philosophers waste their time making theories about conditioning and impulses.

Is silence the best answer

Most of the difficult questions dont have a answer.

Why does this happen and why does'nt that happen?
Why is the world this way and not better?
Why are people so selfish?
Why do I always think about myself?
Does my life have a meaning?

So many questions and one beautiful answer silence.

Its so scary to be silent because may be you realize that answers don't matter.

Hope and Prayer

Two of the guys in my university drowned in the pool near my apartments.They were totally drunk.They were college going kids(hardly 23 yrs old).They were international students doing their masters in engineering and management.

I was shocked to hear the news.One of them is my classmate.Drinking in many of the universities is considered to be a very casual thing.No one is serious about the consquences.Sometimes small mistakes have huge consquences.I pray for their families in India and may god give them the courage and hope to withstand the pain.

Be careful when you drink.

Sometimes a drink here and a drink there can cost a life.

Lets their souls rest in peace!!!

Also posted on
http://www.helpothers.org/my/story.php?op=view&sid=1245

Aloneness is the first lesson of Love

I found this article..Felt it resonates with what I feel as one of the biggest problems of our time..


Without the other we don't know who we are, we lose our identity. The other becomes a mirror and we can see our faces in it. Without the other we are suddenly thrown to ourselves.We are greatly inconvenienced because we don't know who we are when we are alone. With the other, things are clear, defined. We know the name, we know the form, we know the person — Hindu, Christian, Indian, American — there are some ways to define the other How to define yourself?

Deep down there is an abyss... undefinable emptiness. You start merging into that. It creates fear. You become frightened. You want to rush towards the other. The other helps you to remain out. When there is nobody you are simply left with your emptiness.Nobody wants to be alone. The greatest fear in the world is to be left alone. People do a thousand and one things just not to be left alone.You imitate your neighbours so you are just like them.

You lose your individuality, you lose your uniqueness, you just become imitators, because otherwise, you will be left alone. You become part of a crowd, a church, an organisation. Somehow you want to merge with a crowd where you can feel at ease, so that you are not alone.To be alone is really the greatest miracle. That means now you don't belong to any church or organisation, you don't belong to any theology or ideology — socialist, communist, fascist, Hindu, Christian, Jain, Buddhist — you don't belong, you simply are.

And you have learnt how to love your indefinable, ineffable reality. You have come to know how to be with yourself.

Loneliness is absence of the other

Loneliness is absence of the other. Aloneness is the presence of oneself. Aloneness is very positive. It is an overflowing presence.You are so full of presence that you can fill the whole universe with your presence and there is no need for anybody.If the whole world disappears this zen master will not miss anything; he will be as happy as ever. He will love that tremendous emptiness, this pure infinity.He will not miss anything because he has arrived home. He knows that he himself is enough unto himself.

This does not mean that a man who has become enlightened and has come home does not live with others. In fact, only he is capable of being with others.Because he is capable of being with himself he becomes capable of being with others. If you are not capable of being with yourself, how can you be capable of being with others?A man who loves his aloneness is capable of love, and a man who feels loneliness is incapable of love. A man who is happy with himself is full of love, flowing.

He does not need anybody's love, hence he can give. When you are in need how can you give? You are a beggar. And when you can give, much love comes towards you.It is a natural response. The first lesson of love is to learn how to be alone. Try it, to have the feel. Just sit alone sometimes. That's what meditation is all about — just sitting alone, doing nothing.

If you start feeling lonely then there is something missing in your being, then you have not been able yet to understand who you are.Then go deeper into this loneliness until you come to a layer when suddenly loneliness transforms itself into aloneness. Loneliness is the negative aspect of aloneness.If you go deeper into it one moment is bound to come when suddenly you will start feeling the positive aspect of it. Because both aspects are always together.

Excerpted from The Discipline of Transcendence, courtesy Osho International Foundation. www.osho.com

Obstacles in Action

What happens when we become more aware of our actions.When we realize the result of our actions and try to see that we don't go against our own convictions.We begin a new battle.The battle is with our inner obstacles.The whole world gets turned inward and we realize everything we saw outside also exists in us.
I don't believe that anything can be done with hatred.To hate and to rebel it may never lead anyone towards liberation.Only acceptance may do that.Detachment may get us closer to the required result.

It took me a thousand steps to reach the cliff
I saw the peak and was scared
My own ignorance made me slip a million steps
But I did not give up
I was patient
Then one day I was there...
I was standing on the highest point ..
Then my eyes went above me
I saw a series of cliffs higher than mine
I started climbing ....

Obstacles in Realization

As always the obstacle to realization is desire.We all have desires and it may be sometimes very difficult to renounce them.The test for desire lies in permanence.Many times we desire things/goals which are impermanent. Our being can't understand the reason for this attraction,but we are attached to it.The easiest way to realize our true selves is acceptance.The acceptance of desire.This in turn reduces the amount of fuel put into the attachment and we can continue to desire things which are impermanent by nature.

Karma/service

I take a drop of water
I let it flow into the ocean
I walk towards the light
The traveller fills his sack with water
As hours passs by ,I reach for the shade
I ask the traveller for water
The drops of water runs down my throat...

Life is a paradox...

When I need it I dont get it
When I am happy without it
I get showered with it..
When I love it I dont get it
When I am bored by it it sits by my feet
When I struggle everyday to live
I dont see how precious it is
When I about to die I struggle to hold it
When I need acceptance from everyone
I never get it
When I dont give a damn what others think
They realize that I make sense
When I need someone
I am lonely
When I am happy alone
Everyone wants to be with me!!!

Play of power

Are all beings equal...
I dont know..
I keep wondering whether it is possible to exist as equals .
No hierarchy,no supremacy,no submission..
But the world I think exists only in fantasies , it is never possible .Each one of us has a ego centric self which wants importance.Its impossible to find a person without an ego .If a person can reach a state of pure consciousness and continously revel in it then everyday life would be a torture.The pain of existing in this superficial world would be next to impossible.I have myself observed in countless occasions my own drive for domination in any argument.
We continoulsy change from one moment to another..
Our emotions change,the self changes...
But when we reach a state where we can accept our own imperfections and faults we reach a higher state of realization.The love we have for ourselves and acceptance will surely get reflected towards others.The relationship we have with others will attain a value of kindness and understanding rather than the "play of power".But arguments are never wrong and I feel everyone should learn and love to disagree but respect and tolerance sholuld always be the basis for our being.
The concept of ego is so difficult to understand and it constantly varies between fact and fiction.But I dont think when we enter into the realm of spiritulaity we look for absolutes.We just look for questions and search for a valid reason.

Ego is like darkness.It is a fantasy.But if you ask yourself whether it exists then it is very good question because it shows your awareness.Ego is like darkness.You cannot remove darkness from a room.Instead of that bring a lamp it will bring light and remove darkeness.A lamp of realization will let you surrender.

Swami Nithyananda

Aimless

You walk during the day
You are lost in the night
You wonder why there exists a strange emptiness
You run because you get late
You dont know, when you are going to reach
You still continue
The journey is beautiful
The destination will surely come...

Wealth

There are three major kinds of wealth which humans generally pursue.
1.Material
2.Physical
3.Spirutual

Material wealth is highly regarded by many people.It gives identity to people and also makes them feel very good.It boosts the confidence and shoots you up on the popularity scale.You can have anything you want.Even a partner for life is selected based on this factor.If you are stink-ingly rich you wont have any problems finding million people running back of you to marry you.We spend mostly ..lets consider minimum 21 years of education so that we can have material riches for the rest of our life.They are exceptions who work ,because their job is their passion.But we are drawing a general tangent of how mostly the society thinks and behaves.Considering the various advantages there is no wonder that most of the people slog like slaves sometimes doing the work they hate so that they become rich and ignore their health.
But this wealth has the biggest disadvantage :It is temporary.Once we attain the goals set on the basis of materialism we become accustomed to the luxury.Then it is no longer a asset it becomes our basic lifestyle.Our lives become shallow..

Physical wealth is given lot of importance in this world.Our lives somehow are defined by our physical appearance.Looking through all the matrimonial advertisements in the leading Indian newspapers gives us a general idea of how much our society is run on "Fairness" and "Slimness".To add more misery,there are "Fair and Handsome"advertisements which run through our televisions.I hope atleast one human right activist watches these advertisements and start a movement which can wipe out the bias in humans which springs up due to the colour of the skin.Most of the activists are worried about skimpy clothes in movies.I dont know why they dont want to fight for the common soul on roads who get stares and comments because they are dark.I always hoped to see dark actress in movies ..but I dont think whether in my life time I can see that happen.But physical fitness is important for our life.I do believe that if we dont take care of our body,our body does not take care of us.
The mind body connection is very important.But a good body with a impure mind is of no use.

Spirutual wealth is the highest form of wealth a human can achieve.This wealth is only acquired when we give away things.We should learn to give love,kindness,compassion and forgiveness so that these qualities become our very nature.The obsctacles to our achievement of this wealth is our illusions.Our reality when it gets defined by external factors we fail to achieve this wealth.Most of the people dont think this wealth is important.Because firstly it includes suffering because we need our unhealthy old habits to die and cultivate new positive habits.
Death always causes misery because we are uncomfortable with our new self.Lets again consider the matrimonail advertisements again..They are no mention of values like honesty,integrity and kindness.Hardwork and sincerity are also left out.Our job resumes will atleast contain more data about our personality.But when it comes to choosing someone to spend our life we use money,caste and status.This is a sad reality which exists.One of my friends once saw me reading the Bhagavad Gita and she told me how her parents and her family elders have warned her and told her that this holy book should never be read.To add to the contradiction her family is very religious and they visit lot of temples.The spirtual path is the most painful journey of our life but without walking along this path we fail to do justice to life.

If

One of the best poems I have ever read..

IF

If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you,
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
But make allowance for their doubting too;
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or being lied about, don't deal in lies,
Or being hated, don't give way to hating,
And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise:

If you can dream - and not make dreams your master,
If you can think - and not make thoughts your aim;
If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster
And treat those two impostors just the same;
If you can bear to hear the truth you've spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,
And stoop and build 'em up with worn-out tools:

If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it all on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings
And never breath a word about your loss;
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: "Hold on!"

If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
Or walk with kings - nor lose the common touch,
If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you,
If all men count with you, but none too much;
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds' worth of distance run,
Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it,
And - which is more - you'll be a Man, my son!

Rudyard Kipling (1865-1936)

Everything is as it should be

The hands of time have never stopped moving forward
The planets have never stopped revolving
The buds still blossom even though you dont notice
The great trees which stood centuries still fall
Noise made by the great fall is never heard
The bells still toll when you make a mistake
A thousand things done right wont vanish the guilt
The silent world events happen when you dont notice
A shadow is creeping behind you as you read this
There is always a observer
You may sometimes deny that
But life works in that way
Everything is as it should be
The rivers will never wash away the dirt
The marks are always left behind
When you dont hear or notice the shadow creeps inside
The pain and screams never stop
The silence which you have may last for a minute
The illusions which you have built will collapse
In your pride you may dissolve
Nothing can change ..
and last forever

The Art of Happiness.

This post is actually about a book called "The Art of Happiness".This book is actually a conversation between the Dalai Lama and the psychologist Howard .C.Cutler.
I was a bit hesitant at first to start of with the book, because deep down inside I did not want my difficulties to be wiped away by some rituals.Faith for me is a very difficult thing to understand.I can have faith on people,myself and everything which exists.But to have faith on mythological beings is difficult …sometimes impossible.Sometimes I am also envious of people who have this deep hidden faith which tells them that "going to this place/religious "all problems will be cured.I do believe in evolving as a human and realizing the true self through contemplative practices.
But the book turned out to be a eye opener.The book gives you hope, not that it promises you some quick fix techniques which can solve most of the terrifying problems but it gives you principles of compassion.
Kindness and Compassion are the two concepts which gives us inner strength.I have heard many people say that in this competitive world there is no place for compassion. People would take revenge and satisfy their ego rather than try to break the cycle of hatred.

Midnight Blues

This world runs on preconceived assumptions which have no logic or reason.Most of the famous painters and poets in the world were potrayed as mad people.Most of the people who made great changes happen in our world were shot dead.The revolutionaries were always hanged or burned alive. The credit were never flooded on their feet.They could never see the dawn after the misery.
All they wanted was to belong to this world ...
All they needed was a little recognition...
Its not that I want the world to change
Not that the minds of the society is run by intelligence
The world has always been a fools paradise
Freedom has been compromised everytime
Its one question which bothers me always
Am I the sane in the insane world
The crazy among the average
The world has always been a mystery
Dreams have always been my place!!!

Alone-ness

There is this strange alone-ness which each of us possess .Our deepest self knows that.We suffer so much trying to connect to others .But the world does not understand..The world does not perceive..


The silence in the continuous melody
The moment of failure
The ectasy of joy
The instrument can never play the music
It watches as the sound flows...
This moment defines your life your the observer ...
You make illusions ...
You create ..
You forget..
You weep at fate
But you are the one who made this eternal world..
The voice never dies..
You are here and will always exist...

Oh lordy, trouble so hard
Oh lordy, trouble so hard
Don't nobody know my troubles but God
Don't nobody know my troubles but God
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ivtKcM1DGeY

Part 2 :The Others

This post is mostly concerned about others..literally..I have been cheated so many times .....I had to think why this was happening to me again and again...My friends for whom I wasted my time,energy and above all my trust and love have given me only grief ,sadness and suffering.Few of them have even cheated of the little money I had earned staying on my own.

For example:

The laptop I had bought ,was sold to me by one of my friends.(for 800$) Few months later I found out that even that was stolen from a shop.There were many other instances which happened which kept my mind busy and no day went without someone or other troubling the hell out of me.The most difficult part for me to understand that I never cheated them..I was always careful that I don't do something which may hurt anyone or do something which will kill my conscience and I lose sleep in the nights.Last one year was a major year for me because I realised that it was my own fault that I could never make good decisions.I could never analyse a person(only analyse not judge).Everyone I used to meet I used to colour them according to what I feel the person should be.If they were educated or knowledgeable I used to feel that they had impeccable character and high values.I was so caught up in my own imaginations about the goodness of everyone that when ever I used to see a tiny fault I used to just sweep it away.I never thought about it .Never questioned it. The imagination of building up a person in my mind clouded their real self .The "other" in this case is the imagination of a being who doesn't exist.This projection of mind distorted the reality of existence.

Creating a vaccum

Is it difficult to live your life expecting nothing???

When ever we have a difficult time with work or in general our life we tend to analyse it.We interrogate ourselves until we have worn ourselves out.People will tell you to take some time off.We leave the place.Place a identity of a tourist on yourself,barge your self into new place, new roads,new destination.But it is the same you.Sometimes we feel that only we when we give up the relentless need for knowing definite answers we reach a conclusion.The feelings,the emotions still exist.You cannot forget the past .You feel if only you had a pill like in matrix to know whether we exist like nameless numbers without any sense of existence.Can we erase some parts of us.We leave old habits and then we form new habits.Does nothing exist?
But I have always found that when we feel out of control and you feel helpless and when you can only control your response that is the real test of life.You don't wait and plan for tomorrow.You live in a vaccum where even your body does not give you company.Your mind is tired,body is stressed with anxiety and pain then you can clearly feel a part of you still is residing which does exist.The despair or total happiness in any situation shows you a part which does not belong to your identity as a machine with a mind and body.These moments are valuable and when life pushes this on everyone we need to just wait and listen .

Noise

Is it possible to reduce the disturbance in our heads..
Does silence exist for ever...
Even the most enlightened beings would tell you that it is impossible to exist in bliss forever.Even if you leave all attachments and leave to Himalayas...
You will have noise...You struggles will come from within you..the external ones have disappeared....the internal struggle will start....
But how long do we continue this process of learning .
Is there a end??
Is death the end??
May be the answer lies in realization of the fact that disturbance is the natural state.Hunger,suffering,disease,doubts are common in this world..we can never escape them..We can always scale them down.Instead of suffering for mundane issues of life(like not having the latest brands of clothes) we suffer for humanity.We suffer when we see thousands die in useless wars ..we suffer when our neighbours die in hunger and in our minds we are happy...This suffering teaches us that we belong to bigger family.It allows us to take action, manifest our greatness and realize our own divinity.

Enlightement is the falling of the leaf
It happens for a second
You weep for the silence
Your heart drowns in joy
But it is gone
Just as it came
For a second lasts for an eternity
And infinity cannot be measured by a second...