Sense of Duty

Do something everyday that you dont want to do ; this is the Golden rule for acquiring the habit of doing your duty without pain !!!
- Mark Twain

The white board in my cube at work, consists of few noise waveforms and the quotation given above on the right hand side. When I read this quotation it rings a familiar bell in my ear. When I was a kid, my mother used to explain me the sense of entitlement she felt towards performing her duties.

The concept of duty exists only in mythologies starting from Mahabhartha all the way to Samurai movies(Akira Kurosawa). I find "Duty" is a good antidote for procastination and fear. In the era of instant gratification where everything has to be served in under 5 minutes and where pleasure search has become our ultimate goal ....the word duty gives me solace. We all have to pay our dues to everyone around us and as long as we keep our integrity through our daily grind to do our best we all can sleep comfortably.

The First Impression

How easy it is to judge a person on first glance???

We all automatically slot people into different categories when we meet someone. They either are an elite group higher than us or depending upon their life story, inferior to us. Lately I am trying to put an hold on this automatic response. Judgement is an important tool to form trust. To survive we need the skills of discrimination and judgement. How do we match the two contradictions and reach a compassionate stance where we don't slot people and at the same time give them a second chance to prove themselves. Our view of others is used to form our world. When external commands give us value, we are more prone to judgement. Our worth should come from within us. There are people who can motivate us or inspire us to do better. But when the inspiration comes from within us, it is more pure and gives our life meaning.

Dalai lama Lecture - Eight Ways To Train the Mind

I was fortunate to attend Dalai Lama's lecture in San Jose California.

The topic was - Eight Ways to Train the Mind.

For the benefit of everyone who could not attend the lecture,I have added the link to the complete explanation of verses.

Verse 1

With a determination to achieve the highest aim
For the benefit of all sentient beings
Which surpasses even the wish-fulfilling gem,
May I hold them dear at all times

Verse 2

Whenever I interact with someone,
May I view myself as the lowest amongst all,
And, from the very depths of my heart,
Respectfully hold others as superior.

Verse 3

In all my deeds may I probe into my mind,
And as soon as mental and emotional afflictions arise-
As they endanger myself and others-
May I strongly confront them and avert them

Verse 4

When I see beings of unpleasant character
Oppressed by strong negativity and suffering,
May I hold them dear-for they are rare to find-
As if I have discovered a jewel treasure!

Verse 5

When others, out of jealousy
Treat me wrongly with abuse, slander, and scorn,
May I take upon myself the defeat
And offer to others the victory.

Verse 6

When someone whom I have helped,
Or in whom I have placed great hopes,
Mistreats me in extremely hurtful ways,
May I regard him still as my precious teacher.

Verse 7

In brief, may I offer benefit and joy
To all my mothers, both directly and indirectly,
May I quietly take upon myself
All hurts and pains of my mothers.

Verse 8

May all this remain undefiled
By the stains of the eight mundane concerns;
And may I, recognizing all things as illusion,
Devoid of clinging, be released from bondage.

http://www.dalailama.com/teachings/training-the-mind

S.N Goenka Interview

S.N.Goenka's interview on NDTV regarding Vipassana Meditation.


http://www.ndtv.com/video/player/walk-the-talk/walk-the-talk-with-s-n-goenka/149260

GIVE INDIA

I visited Parivaar 2 years ago.It was such a inspiration to meet people who genuinely cared about children and their needs.

Parivaar ( www.parivaar.org )is listed on Give India, a very reputed fundraising interface. Give India is having a special event called 'India Giving Challenge' and for 40 days it will match each donation that an organisation raises from amongst its supporters. The period which started from 8th of September will go on till 20th Oct. So if a person donates x amount to Parivaar (through Parivaar's page on Give India site) during this period, it shall be matched with an equal amount and will effectively become 1.91x (a small part is retained by Give for its transaction processing charge).

Last year Parivaar won this contest and emerged as the highest funds-collecting organisation from amongst hundred plus participant organisations. We won about Rs 20 Lacs extra as prizes for this contest.

Donations are welcome during the course of this week (19th to 25th September). That will enable Parivaar to win a Speical Weekly prize in this period.

Our page, from where one can donate, is at :

http://www.giveindia.org/give/pledgepage/ParivaarIndiaGivingChallenge2010

I wanted to request you all to make a donation (any amount 1k, 2k, 5k, 10k)) through Give India to Parivaar so that it effectively doubled. It will be matched by Give India, and we want to take our fund-collection to 50 Lacs by 20th October.

Leadership

The most important aspect of leadership is respect . Its not what the group members offer the chosen leader,its what the leader offers the group members.Its not easy to be respectful of people who have flaws.Every human is a imperfect being going towards perfection.

How to respect other people is a lesson, I don't think they teach in management schools.I somehow am amazed, at how my mind is stuck on its own beliefs and refuses to respect other's opinions.May be I belong to the old school, when I say the leader's intention guards the well being of the group.When a person really cares about others , the dormant potential just rises up.

To have respect for our enemies takes us a long way.

Shapes and Forms

The judgements we dont voice out and which are kept shrouded in shame sometimes shape the bias in our beliefs.As a spiritual seeker I have learnt to watch my own reactions.Its painful to see the root of some of my beliefs.

Some of them stem from complexes which are got from negativity.

Some are got from movies and fairy tales.

Some are got from positive people who have influenced my life.

Its a nerve racking process to break and go underneath some of my complex insecurities.But is it necessary to dig and find out our innate behavioural pattern.Is it necessary to contemplate on our own.In Vipassana Meditation terms ,is it required to perform our own "Mind surgery".The release of patterns which are in built and auto pilot is mandatory for everyone.If that does not happen we repeat the same patterns which have harmed us in the past.Personally,I have benefited a lot from this approach.Its like a emotional baggage which is thrown off instantly when you realize the triggers.

Universal Loving Kindness

This affirmation by Dalai Lama had a deep impact on my life.When I having too much anger or hate,it calms me down.The practice of meditation ends with "Metta".To ensure peace and happiness for everyone.

Universal Loving Kindness - By Dalai Lama

May I be well,happy and peaceful

May no harm come to me

May no difficulties come to me

May no problems come to me

May I always meet with success.

May I also have patience,courage,understanding and determination to meet and overcome difficulties,problems and failures in life.

May my parents be well,happy and peaceful.

May no difficulties come to them.

May they always meet with success.

May they also have patience,courage,understanding and determination to meet and overcome difficulties,problems and failures in life.

May my teachers be well,happy and peaceful.

May no difficulties come to them.

May they always meet with success.

May they also have patience,courage,understanding and determination to meet and overcome difficulties,problems and failures in life.

May my relatives be well,happy and peaceful.

May no difficulties come to them.

May they always meet with success.

May they also have patience,courage,understanding and determination to meet and overcome difficulties,problems and failures in life.

May my friends be well,happy and peaceful.

May no difficulties come to them.

May they always meet with success.

May they also have patience,courage,understanding and determination to meet and overcome difficulties,problems and failures in life.

May all indifferent persons be well,happy and peaceful.

May no difficulties come to them.

May they always meet with success.

May they also have patience,courage,understanding and determination to meet and overcome difficulties,problems and failures in life.

May my enemies be well,happy and peaceful.

May no difficulties come to them.

May they always meet with success.

May they also have patience,courage,understanding and determination to meet and overcome difficulties,problems and failures in life.

May all living beings be well,happy and peaceful.

May no difficulties come to them.

May they always meet with success.

May they also have patience,courage,understanding and determination to meet and overcome difficulties,problems and failures in life.

Image of Perfection

Disappointments from others are bound to happen.

The world will never have a perfect answer to most questions.

Most of the judgements which we pass on others comes from a place which demands perfection.Spirituality,is sometimes defined as the process to attain perfection.But spirituality is a journey which we have to take ourselves.Fear of not attaining the highest standards set by someone else torments many of us everyday.We live in a "Amoral" universe.Morality is defined by myths,beliefs,rituals,society and above all the trendsetters.Being judgemental negates the true meaning of perfection.We pick the minor detours and tell them as the important part of the journey.

Thansirro Bhikku tells in his discourse how being judicial is more important than being judgemental.Being judicial you make decisions which are good for you and also for others.These decisions come from a pure source of facts not mixed with fear,jealousy or envy.Being judgemental is victory for the ego.You have made the person surrender to their faults.Expressing our displeasure in a way which empowers the other is important.This is not very easy,but can be done with some mindfulness.

The Everlasting

To be immortal and never to die,brings on such grief.The beauty of death is underestimated by the ignorant world.

"The Everlasting " is a movie about a family who discover the spring of immortality.The movie portrays the sorrow of the family who see everyone die,but they somehow have to live on for centuries.There is one scene in the movie, where they protagonist tells a girl about the wheel of life.The beauty of life according to him lies in change.The constant rejuvenation of birth and death is what makes life so beautiful.

Death has the ability to wipe the slate clean.

There is also a mythical story on the same lines from a European legend.It tells the story on a old man who has the ability to see death.He one day captures death in a bag and keeps death under house arrest.The whole world was first in joy at the sudden disappearance of death.Then people started crying on his doorstep to release death.They wanted to be reborn and start again.

The movie "The Everlasting " was inspired from a book with the same title.

The importance of Silence

Silence is such a vital part of everyday life.Without silence,our minds wont be able to comprehend the vast sector of information which is given to us daily.Appreciation of silence should be taught to everyone, from a very young age.When the external noise is switched off,the mind does not become automatically quiet.The battle to quieten the mind, just starts.The only reason people shun away from silence is that, it brings all the emotions which we have kept hidden.

Fear,loneliness,despair,joy and issues about identity can come with a force when we are silent.

There is no way to deal with everything at the same instant.Sometimes you have to just let it pass by.

What does Success Mean to You???

A very tough question to crack!!!!

Success is a multifaceted, personal concept. By defining what that concept represents to you personally, and by taking the time to write it down, you will automatically move your life in that direction.

Taken from http://advancedlifeskills.com/blog/what-is-success/

I try to realize that I should not get threatened by other's priorities.From a very young age,I have seen people who shove their views about success upon others.As a undergraduate,I was told how being a software engineer was a mark of success.I was ostracized by well meaning adults who thought that, I was making the biggest mistake of my life not attending software job interviews.I am glad I followed my heart and did other things which fulfilled me as a individual.(Art,Astronomy,Music,Literature)

Many of my friends laughed at me when I spent hours pouring on books in British Library. But those experiences have made me a better person.My affirmations everyday used to be

"I wont make deals with the devil " ...."I wont sell my soul for pieces of paper."

It is so important in life to chalk down priorities which give us happiness.If you want to be financially stable,then it is necessary to write down a hard number which gives you a sense of security.

I dont say that it's going to be easy journey.But a hard look at yourself will save time from chasing the mirages which promise happiness.

Tailoring Your Own Education

I am a firm believer that we can learn on our own.

I started to wonder why do we need universities in the first place???

Universities existed for a long time.Nalanda university in India can be compared to MIT in the present world.The methods of teaching have come a long way.Now a days with open source text books and lectures available online we can equip ourselves with greater amount of knowledge.

But real life problems cannot be solved alone.We need to connect with people who have treaded the path before.As Scott Berkun says in his book "The Myths of Innovation" ,the lone inventor has to stand on the shoulders of earlier inventors.Most of the time its not a lone inventor...But a bunch of people (hundreds of people) working towards a solution.

We have to build our lives in a world which is filled with people who have different ideas.IQ alone cannot help anyone.So a degree in any profession can be helpful if we are lucky.

I am indeed very grateful to few good professors I had met during my undergraduate and graduate courses.(Even though there were few ,who made my life a living hell)

The input from people you work with is such a important factor in our lives.

Reminder

Where the mind is without fear and the head is held high,
Where knowledge is free;
Where the world has not been broken up into fragments by narrow domestic walls;
Where words come out from the depth of truth;
Where tireless striving stretches its arms towards perfection;
Where the clear stream of reason has not lost its way into the dreary desert sand of dead habit;
Where the mind is led forward by thee into ever-widening thought and action– into that heaven of freedom,
My Father,
Let my country awake.

Rabindranath Tagore

Leadership

These are few links I found on Leadership

Wanted: Courage, Compassion and Character - Round Table Conference at Stanford University (Link Courtesy :My Husband)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LTRcPlNfynA&feature=player_embedded#!

Solitude and Leadership

http://www.theamericanscholar.org/solitude-and-leadership/

Simon Sinek: How great leaders inspire action

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qp0HIF3SfI4&feature=related

Kavita Ramdas at TED

http://www.youtube.com/user/tedtalksdirector?blend=1&ob=4#p/u/20/n9Z_pccScW0

The Mythical Hero's Journey

It is never evident in our teenage years what plans life has laid down for us.I do not believe in a fatalistic view of life,but I do believe that life has its goals which somehow get fulfilled through the individual experience.When I look backward and connect all the dots,some experiences make perfect sense in the present moment.But looking forward or imagining where the chips fall would be bad idea.To be prepared for the storm is fine by all means,but lets not predict its exact moment.The journey each individual takes is so unique.Books, road maps,amulets,gurus,secret incantations,beauty,power,ambition,luck,intelligence ...nothing can prepare us.None of these, will save us from the blows which life would give.Lets choose the battles wisely.The hero has to return to the starting point.The sacred circle of return would be marked by a change,which would never appear on the outside...but would be deep within the inner realms of his/her soul.Too much time is wasted fighting other's battles,or taking detours with topics which don't matter.Once we know what matters most,we focus,learn and evolve....

Hands on Experience

As a electrical engineer,I feel I am blessed to have a job where I get to see how strategies are employed.I am there from the start. ... A rough model is got by brainstorming,converted into a reality by experimentation and then placed into the product and validated.It not a one "person" show.It involves around a hundred employees doing their best.When I graduated the mindset I had, was so different.I existed in a world which was idealized and complex models existed as mathematical equations.In the real world no such thing exists.The toughest thing is not to solve the mathematical or logical questions.The hardest part would be to make everything work.It requires understanding human Psyche,and being non judgemental.It requires understanding other's perspectives.It requires knowing that even though you may have a advanced degree you are not advanced than others..You are like everyone else...with faults..with fallacies which come out unexpectedly like everyone else.

A skill which we use our own hands to built stuff is necessary for everyone.When humans first evolved they used their hands to build everything.Somehow we are losing touch on the elemental fundamentals.I am not saying that we should treat automation as a bane.But we need to understand the pain that people take to build stuff.Everything comes out of some one's sweat and it may be invisible but it is still there.Even though I have not perfected the art of not judging other professions.....I am improving...

Every job is noble and has its own worth...Who am I to rate it as better or worse...But the teachers have told that if I fail,I may end up doing the menial jobs..But to unlearn this program in my mind..it may take me some time..

Taken from New york Times Article...

The visceral experience of failure seems to have been edited out of the career trajectories of gifted students. It stands to reason, then, that those who end up making big decisions that affect all of us don’t seem to have much sense of their own fallibility, and of how badly things can go wrong even with the best of intentions (like when I dropped that feeler gauge down into the Ninja). In the boardrooms of Wall Street and the corridors of Pennsylvania Avenue, I don’t think you’ll see a yellow sign that says “Think Safety!” as you do on job sites and in many repair shops, no doubt because those who sit on the swivel chairs tend to live remote from the consequences of the decisions they make. Why not encourage gifted students to learn a trade, if only in the summers, so that their fingers will be crushed once or twice before they go on to run the country?

http://prayatna.typepad.com/education/workbased_learning/

The Unlearning Curve

Education gives you knowledge for a particular skill.It makes you a specialist in a field.Gives you a comfy job,by which you make a living.

Wisdom on the other hand does not depend on these narrow limitations.It cannot be taken for granted that a person who has degrees from the best university,highest number of letters has the most amount of wisdom.It is such a difficult unlearning curve for me.I take it for granted that... Education= Wisdom.A poor person ,a person who is illiterate,a person who begs on the street may still have the wisdom which I lack.Kabir was an illiterate weaver.

Why is it so difficult for me to love tribal music?

Why does the melody which stirs my heart is refused by my mind... as not good enough???

Why did mythology which has so many avenues to wisdom was rejected by my scientific mind for such a long time??

What conditioned bias do I hold inside me which refuses the divinity of tribal gods and embraces the modernity of sophisticated philosophical theories??

Only time can help me unravel my own difficulties of accepting the vast manifestations of creativity which lies in each of us.

References

Deep Forest - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HtgcmLS6B8E&feature=related
Bare Foot College-Bunker Roy Talk
http://itc.conversationsnetwork.org/shows/detail783.html

Social Reform

Other than having interest in social entrepreneurship,my life long ambition is to be a part of the social reform process in India.I never knew the deep diseases which the Indian society suffered till I stepped into the realm of higher education in India.This is a common sight among lot of professional colleges in India,where there is a steady influx of all classes of society(lower,upper and middle)
If higher places of education have so many problems,it really shocks me even to think the problems faced by the dalits in the improvershied areas.

The upper class maintaining its strong hold on wealth,were no different than the lower and middle class.They suffered the same bias.The engineering classes became a lecture in tribal hierarchy formed by the so called "mini adults".I call them mini adults as they reflect the environment in their homes.As I studied in Hyderabad,I can write more clearly about the problems which trouble the girls there.I was outcast(I am a Tamilian!!!! and to add another layer of discrimination a veggie loving Iyer)
Dowry,skin color discrimination,second rate citizenship on basis of gender and to be treated as if "being born as a girl was a curse !!!!!!" was few of the things which I could see as on a regular day to day basis.
A assistant professor in Electrical Engineering coming to the class and encouraging the boys to study more hard so that they can fetch more dowry in the future.(The college I studied was branded No 1 that year for Elec Engg...)
The problem which bothers me even now(so many years after I have graduated)...is that those girls thought it was normal to be treated badly.Their hope lied in getting married, giving birth to sons and redeem their position in the male dominated world...I could see how female feticide was a big problem clearly after I heard these reasons...(Rajasthan had the highest number of female feticides in the last decade)
This is one of the things I love about USA...People get treated most of the times(99.9%) as a equal.I dont see any discrimation on such a deeper level like India.Workplaces and educational institutions command respect and the professors behave with maturity.There may be a random bad fruit in the bunch,but on the whole "HUMAN DIGNITY IS PRESERVED"...

The question remains

It bothers me..
Why should it bother me...
When it does not bother those girls..???
Change comes from within ...It cannot be forced...
Is social revolution possible in India???


Reference

Found this video ...A debate on skin color NDTV(We The People)
Not just skin deep prejudice

http://www.ndtv.com/news/videos/video_player.php?id=1143397

Moral Principles

In olden days "Religion" was a mixture of legal code,medicine,idle superstitions,wise direction and dirty politics.In recent times, we do see a division of all these disciplines in a country.The lines between all these divisions are blurred and for a ignorant few,they don't even exist...

To solve our moral dilemmas using ancient texts would be wrong move.Firstly,they may have value in their era.Once these texts have been displaced to our time,they lose their contextual laws.Trying to use Laws of Manu(in the case of women rights) in recent times, would be a grave mistake.Like a river washing away ancient debris,moral debates should be solved with fresh perspective.They should consider the socio-political and economic conditions of the present time.Historical texts should not be discarded,but they may be used as a pointer to better alternatives.